Ending up where you started
by Girlygirl
Summary: Everyone ends up where they started in the end. Brazen
1. Made promises and broken vows

I own nothing. This story starts when Jax leaves Brenda and she ends up in front of Jason's penthouse. I've changed some things, like where Carly ends up. I hope you like it and please review.

Ending up where you started 

You always end up where you started and for Brenda that was exactly what happened. After wondering around Port Charles she ended up back at the Port Charles Hotel, in the room of her almost wedding to Jasper Jax. She had taken her time walking down the aisle for the second time before dropping down on the steps and crying. She wasn't crying because she missed him and wanted him, or because she loved him but because she hated him and never wanted to see him again, and because he had said very hurtful things to her and he had killed everything they had ever shared together. He had broken her and he would always do so. Maybe that's why she could never chose between Jax and Sonny; she needed them both to be happy, she needed them to balance the other, she needed them both to fine the perfect guy for her. Separately they could never totally work for or with her but together they would have been great. Unfortunately that was too much to ask, to have them both, kinda like having your cake AND eating it too, she wasn't that selfish. She didn't even get to finish wiping the tears on her face before a fresh wave of new once started and there in the dark room, she cried. 

Jason walked out of the elevator when he heard yelled come from Sonny apartment. Heading towards the sound he didn't bother to knock, he just walked right in. The yelling stopped when he entered and he was surprised to find Sonny and Courtney yelling at each other, not Sonny and Carly.

"Jason." Courtney breathed out when she saw him but he didn't say anything to her.

"Where's Carly?" He asked his boss.

"I haven't found her." Sonny told his right hand man, who was giving him a cold look.

"Too busy with Brenda to find her? She could be dead Sonny. You remember what happened last time she found you cheating on her." Jason reminding Sonny of Carly 'death'.

"I'm not with Brenda Jason. I love my wife." Sonny yelled at him but Jason didn't move.

"Then maybe you should find her." Jason suggested.

"Why, so that you can be with Courtney alone?" Sonny accused Jason.

"No, so that nothing happens to Carly." Jason told him and Sonny felt guilty that he had suggested that Jason wasn't totally worried about his best friends safety and nothing else.

"I'm sorry." Sonny said before grabbing his jacket from the desk chair. 

"You're right, I'm going to go find her." Sonny told him. "Brenda said that I should check the places Carly likes best." Sonny added, talking to no one but himself.

"What, when did you see Brenda?" Jason asked, unable to believe that Sonny was with Brenda while Carly was missing.

"You don't know?" Sonny asked Jason, figuring that Jason above everyone would know.

"Know what?" Jason asked, letting his curiosity get the better of him.

"Brenda was here before, she was waiting for you, sitting outside your penthouse." Sonny proceeded to tell Jason and Jason looked ready to kill him if he didn't get to the point of the story.

"Is she alright?" Jason couldn't help but asked, the worry for Brenda clear in his voice.

"Jax left her at the alter. He said no." Sonny told Jason and Jason was heading towards the door before Sonny could blink.

"Where are you going?" Courtney called out and Sonny wanted to know as well.

"I need to find Brenda, she needs me." Jason said before the door closed behind him.

His motorcycle didn't go fast enough and with every dead end he needed it to go a little fasted. So far he's checked everywhere he thought she'd be and still nothing. The next place on his need to check list was Kelly's. Parking the black bike he slipped the keys into his pocket before heading into Kelly's. Brenda was nowhere in sight and he really wanted to scream. He was about to go when the door opened and both Courtney and Sonny walked in. Courtney look as if she might run to him to take his order but Elizabeth better her to it.

"What can I get you?" She asked before looking up to see whom she was serving. Taking a step back she was going to leave but his hand shot out to grab her arm.

"Wait, I need to talk to you. Have you seen Brenda?" He asked the young brunette and she shook her head.

"No, but I heard about the wedding." She said regretfully, offering his a sad smile. He tried giving her a small half smile back but he couldn't really. 

"Thanks." He told her before letting go of her hand.

"Is there anything I can get you?" She asked him again, this time knowing who he was.

"No, I have to go find her. If she stops back tell her to call me. Please." He asked Liz and she nodded. Turning he headed to the door but before he could open it, it swung open and in walked Jax. Jason stood in front of the blond man with a cold stare; ready to hit him for hurting Brenda but holding himself back. 

"Damn it's cold out, Jax." A female voice said from behind Jax and that was when Jason noticed Skye.

"You asshole." Jason growled at the other man before punching him in the face. Jax stumbled back a few feet and Skye was at his side. 

"What are you doing?" She yelled at him. He ignored her and took a step towards Jax.

"I can't believe you, you left Brenda a the alter not even two hours ago and you're already with someone else? You don't deserve her." Jason told him as the rest of the people watched.

"Well the little slut couldn't keep her hands off of Sonny." Jax said and Jason was ready to hit him again and would have if Liz weren't holding him back.

"Don't do it Jason." She told him, once again saving him.

"Go, go find her, she probably need you." Liz added and she watched Jason walk towards the door.

"If you come anywhere near Brenda again I'll kill you." Jason told Jax before leaving.

Brenda looked up from her spot on the steps when the door creaked opened and she could see the shadow of another person.  

"Hello?" She called out, she really wanted to be left alone but the person started down towards her.

"Carly?" Brenda asked confused at why the woman was here.

"Hey." Came the almost friendly greeting as Carly dropped into a chair in the front row facing Brenda. 

"I heard about Jax, about the wedding. I'm sorry." Carly started and Brenda just watched her. 

"But maybe it was for the best, now you and Sonny can be together." Carly added and Brenda pinpointed the tone of Carly's voice, Carly was giving up and that scared Brenda. Carly never gave up on something she wanted. 

"Carly what are you talking about." Brenda asked, knowing that Carly had seen her and Sonny on the docks.

"I'm tired of competing with every other woman that has ever been in Sonny's life. Obviously he doesn't love me, not like he loves you. You were right, you were here first and you'll always be best to him so you two should be together." Carly told her, giving up one of the best thing that had ever happened to her, Sonny.

"Where is this coming from?" Brenda asked her.

"I saw the two of you kissing on the docks." Carly told her and Brenda laughed out loud. 

"Carly what you saw why us saying good bye, not plotting to run away together." Brenda told the blond. Carly's eyebrows knotted together in confusion.

"What?" Carly asked her.

"Sonny told me that he wanted to be able to kiss me and still be in love with you and he was. He told me that you were the best thing that has ever happened to him and that he wanted to spend his life with his family; you and Michael. He told me that he couldn't lose you and he was finally happy, totally happy. Carly, we said good-bye and he wished me luck with Jax and I wished him luck with you because I could truly see that he loved you. He was going to look for you to tell you that but you disappeared." Brenda told the blond that Jason fondly called his best friend who was now in tears. Brenda stood from her spot and hugged the other girl, underneath everything Carly was just scared and unsure but she heart was always in the right place. Carly stood and hugged Brenda back before pulling away and whipping her face.

"Thank you." Carly told her, now feeling bad for Brenda, she was all alone.

"It was nothing, besides me and Sonny would never have worked out, not like you ad him. Now go, go to Sonny." Brenda told her and Carly turned to grab her purse. 

"Are you going to be ok?" Carly asked Brenda and it was then that Carly saw why Jason was protective of Brenda. 

"Yeah, I'll be fine, but Carly, if you hurt him you wouldn't be." Brenda warned the blond before she disappeared from Brenda's sight. Brenda watched Carly till she was out of sight before dropping back on to the step and placing her head in her hands.

"That was nice of you." His voice broke threw her momentary solitude and she looked up at him. He was standing a few feet away from her and with him there she felt safe. She didn't even make it one step towards him before she broke down totally and sunk down to the ground, crying. He rushed to her and bended down, pulling her into his arms and rocking her back and fourth as she cried.

-Girlygirl


	2. Deep Conversations

Here's another part to my story. Please review and remember support Brazen!!!!

Part 2

She cried forever, holding him tighter with every sob that shook her body, he didn't say anything he just sat there holding her to him. Finally the crying stopped but neither of the two moved from their spot, he still held her and she still held him for he was her lifeline. 

"Are you ok?" He asked after what seem forever as they now sat, him on the ground with her wrapped up in his arms. She didn't say anything just nodded her head against his chest. 

"What do you want?" He asked her and still she stayed quiet. Slowly she pulled her head out of its hiding spot and looked at him through the darkness.

"Hmmm." She signed, smiling at him, he was the only person that never let her down.

"What?" He asked her, as the two pulled apart and moved to sit side by side.

"Do you know that you're the only person that's never let me down, even when you hate me." She told him, but her eyes stayed glued on the front of the room.

"I don't hate you." He told her quietly and it made her smile.

"You've done everything for me and never once excepted something in return. You're one in a million Jason." She added, before standing and moving towards the front row chairs, he followed.

"Brenda, do you want to talk about it?" He asked her.

"Not really." She told him before laughing.

"What?" He asked her again.

"I just find it so funny that my only wedding that's every gone through was to you and you don't love me. And I find it funnier that it's you who's shoulder I'm once again crying on because I've been life at the alter." She told him as the tears ran down her face and he moved to place a hand on her shoulder.

"Don't change the subject, Brenda, I know you." He told her and she sunk into the chair, he sat beside her. 

"He said he loved me, Jas. I mean you saw him this morning when you stopped by. Did he look like he wanted to leave me? Could you tell? Was it just me who couldn't see it? God, what's wrong with me?" She asked him, her dark chocolate eye burning into his.

"Nothing, Brenda, nothing wrong with you. You're perfect, it's Jax." Jason told her as he once again pulled her into his arms. 

"Jax has always been like that, Brenda you just didn't want to see it. I mean even when you first married him, he was still married. Jax has a hard time letting go of things Brenda. Jax was the kid in the playground how wanted everything and was use to getting it and even if he hated what he had he didn't want anyone else have it. He has a hard time sharing Brenda and you are a hard thing to share." He told her, meaning every word, Brenda was different, she was special, and she was something you never wanted to share.

"Damn Morgan, that was deep." She told him and he was happy to hear the sarcastic tone in her voice.

Sonny had looked everywhere for Carly, everywhere she had a tendency to go when she was mad, everywhere she went when she was happy and even the places she hated to go; mad or happy. She wasn't anywhere and he was beginning to think she had left Port Charles for good; the only dent in that scenario was that she would never leave Michael. Pushing the elevator button he watched as the doors slid shut and Tony, one of his guards, disappeared from his sight. He was worried, he would never admit it and usually no one could tell, but this time it was about Carly and if the worry wasn't pouring out of his very being he knew that his face gave it away. The dinging of the elevator pulled him back into the here and now and he stepped off the elevator and into the hall outside his penthouse. 

"Johnny." Sonny greeted his most trusted guard, besides Jason.

"Boss, I have to talk to you." Johnny started but Sonny cut him off. 

"No now Johnny, I can't think. I need everyone out looking for Carly, I need to find her. Tell everyone to look for her and to report anything." Sonny told him, Johnny was a friend but he couldn't handle hearing about what territory was trying to be taken over by so and so when Carly was missing.

"But Boss," Johnny tried again and Sonny once again stopped him.

"Not now, Johnny I need to find Carly…." Sonny said before entering his dark penthouse and closing the door behind him.

"…But boss, it's about Carly, she's inside." Johnny finished, knowing that Sonny couldn't hear him.

Sonny didn't bother with the lights, they would just hurt his eyes anyways, instead going over to the mini bar and pouring himself a tall glass of brandy. Bringing the glass to his lips he stopped to take in the sweet smell of the alcohol before parting his lips and letting the liquid trickle down his throat 

"Pour me one while you're there, I had a hell of a day." Came a soft voice from behind him. Sonny let the glass drop to the ground, shattering, before snipping around and facing his intruder, his left hand wrapped tightly around his handgun. His eyes finally adjusted to the light; or lack there of, and be dropped his hold on his gun when he recognized Carly. 

"I knew we were on tine ice, but a gun Sonny?" She joked with him as she pushed herself up from her spot on the couch and made her way towards him.

"God, Carly, where have you been?" He asked her as he gently reached out to trail him figures down her arm; he needed to make sure she was there.

"I've been around." She told him with a smile before she let her hand rest on the side of his face. He placed his bigger hand on top of hers and leaned into her touch. Then suddenly he pulled away.

"You had me worried Carly, you can't keep doing thing like this." He told her, his voice loud and powerfully but she could hear the worried and relief under it.

"I know, I'm sorry." She told him as she went and dropped unto the couch again and he followed.

"So where did you go, really?" He asked her as he slipped his hand into hers. 

"I went to see Brenda." She told him and before he could yell at her she continued. 

"See told me everything Sonny, about the kiss and what you told her and that you still love me and you know what Sonny? I figured something out today." She told him as he listened to her.

"What did you figure out, baby?" He asked her.

"I figured out why you like Brenda and why Jax liked her and why even Jason likes her. She's a good person, underneath all the walls that she puts up to protect herself, she a good person. She understood me Sonny like no other woman ever has and a saw her, the real Brenda. The Brenda that gets hurt and is scared and fights for what she believes in. She had wonderful to me when I saw her and now I understand." Carly told him with a smile and he smiled back.

"Told you she had ok. I told you, you didn't have to worry about me and Brenda." He told her, he had won and she couldn't fight that.

"I know." She told him, happy to have him with her.

"I think that, maybe, if given that chance me and Brenda could be friends Sonny, I'm not saying super bubble gum pop friends, but friends." Carly added.

"Well maybe, we'll see how it goes." Sonny told her before lying back and pulling her on top of him and covering them with the blanket and falling asleep with her.   

-GirlyGirl 


	3. More then anything

Hello, all. It's been soooo long since I last posted. I hope there are still some people out there that want to read my story and if there is here's the next part. Thanks for the review and keep them coming. Enjoy and remember to support BRAZEN!

Ending up where you started

Part 3

"Are you sure?" His voice startled her and she looked up from what she was doing and into clear blue eyes.

"Yes, for the hundredths time, Jason I'm sure." She told him. The first twenty times he had asked that question it had been somewhat cute, the next twenty helped remind her that someone cared for her but after the a hundredths or so it became annoying.

"Just want to make sure you're not making me do this so that you can change your mind." He joked with her as he entered her room and headed towards her.

"I'm not changing my mind, this is something I have to do." She told him seriously, letting the red t-shirt she was holding fall to the bed.

"I know," his hands slid around her waist and he pulled her into his chest for a hug. "I just want you to always be happy."

"Thank you." 

"So anything I can help with?" He asked and she smiled before throwing the fallen red shirt at him.

"Start folding, I still have two closets full of clothes to pack."

"Michael, baby, school." Carly called up the stairs.

"I'm coming, mom." Her son called back and soon after she herd his foots steps descending the stairs.

"Hey, Mr. Man, do you have everything?" She asked him as she slid a permission form into his bag.

"Yup," 

"Good, and don't forget to give your teacher the permission form for the zoo, it's in your bag." She told him as she helped him with his thing and kissed him good-bye before Johnny took him to school.

"Damn, did I miss him?" Sonny's voice asked her and she turned to look at him.

"I'm sorry, sweetie, he just left." She gave him a half smile as he made his way to her.

"That's ok, tomorrow you can personally drive him to school, he'd love that." She suggested.

"I'd love that." Sonny added as he pulled her in for a soft and gently kisses.

"You're a wonderful father, Sonny." She told him, admiring the way he loved Michael as his own.

"Thanks to my wonderful wife." He told her before leaning for another kiss, this time not as gentle. 

"That's everything, right?" Jason asked her, worried that there might be more.

"Yeah, that's all of it." Brenda answered, laughing.

"Hey, Brenda." Her eyes shot up to meet his before he continued. "Are you sure?" She rolled her dark eyes before lunging at him but he grabbed her and both fell over and onto the couch.

"Yes, I'm sure, stop asking." She told him, as she lay pined under him.

"Just checking." He answered her before moving so that they were sitting side by side.

It had been a week since her non-wedding to Jax and they had become close, she had become his best friend and him hers.

"Hey, you going to miss me?" the question surprised him and he turned to look at her. He held her gaze for a minute before she dropped her eyes.

"Are you kidding?" he asked and she looked as if she might cry. 

"That's a stupid question, Brenda." He said, standing from the couch. She didn't say anything or move to look at him. Suddenly she felt herself before pulled up by his strong arms. 

"I'm going to miss you more then anything." He told her and she flung her arms around his neck.

"I can't believe you thought I didn't care that you were leaving." 

"Leaving? Where's she going?" The two pulled apart to see Carly and Sonny standing in the doorway.

"To Europe." Brenda answered.

"What? Why?" Carly asked, looking at Brenda, then Jason and back to Brenda.

"What did he do?" Brenda laughed out loud at Carly's commented.

"Jason didn't do anything, I have to go. I need to clear my head for a while." Brenda told them.

"After everything that's happened, with Alcazar and Jax, I think it's for the best." Jason said, supporting her.

"Were you going to tell us?" Sonny asked them.

"Of course we were just coming over there now." Jason said.

"So where are you going?" Carly needed to know; in the short time the two had developed a friendship of shorts. 

"A little Greek island. Jason set it up, made sure I was taken care of." Brenda told them.

"How long are you going to be gone for?" Was Carly's next question.

"I don't know really, two months, two years." Brenda told her, she hadn't really thought about it. 

"I'll call when I get there." The two women hugged before Brenda moved to her ex and hugged him as well. 

"How about we come to the airport with you two?" Sonny suggested but Carly cut in.

"Sonny, we can't I have to get to the club, we have some things that we need to take care of. Sorry Guys, but you understand." 

"Don't worried about it." Jason assured them before the couple left and Tony came to get Brenda's things.

"What was that Carly?" the confusion clear in her husbands voice.

"They need to say good-bye, Sweetie and I think it would be better for them in private." Carly told him before they stepped off of the elevator and into the limo.

"Plus I think there's a little something we need to do in private." She added before she pulled off her shirt and wrapped her legs around his waist.

-Girlygirl


End file.
